Beauty

They say beauty is only skin deep!

Or the famous beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

 All of my life I have never felt beautiful. I was made fun of as a child for wearing glasses and having a crossed eye by many kids. I was bullied for being ugly! I remember being bullied by these two girls in my neighborhood they would hit on me and call me horrible names and I just stood there and let them and I cried and they did it everyday after school. I was terrified of going to school. I had to walk to and from school every day. I could hide from them in the mornings so it mostly only happened in the afternoons. It was horrible. I was afraid to tell on them because I thought it would make it worse, but now I know I should have told on them. Still to this day it makes me cry. I feel for all the kids today that are being made fun of and bullied.

I have wore glasses as far back as I can remember except when I went to middle school I purposely lost them in hopes that the other kids wouldn't make fun of me, but that didn't help much. The older I got the worse my vision became, but thankfully I slowly grew out of being bullied by others. I still don't feel beautiful or even pretty. 

I don't like being in pictures or smiling at the camera. I don't like making eye contact and everyone always thinks I'm mad because of the look on my face and the way my voice sounds, but I'm not mad at all its just how I am. I believe I have Aspergers Syndrome. 

I am trying to get out of my comfort zone and learn to love myself and see myself as being beautiful by selling Younique makeup. When you sell Younique makeup it forces you to be interactive with other people and I have to take pictures of myself and eventually videos of myself putting the makeup on if I can get past my nervousness everything may go well. I want to feel comfortable in my skin. I want to love myself for who I am and what I look like.

You can see who I am in the pictures.

The photographer would always ask me to take my glasses off for pictures.